Writing Contest

Ingredients

• One Vinca flower.
• One fairly large ostrix leg.
• Two cups of egg-nog.
• Three ounces of almonds.
• Four ounces of mozzarella.
• Five pongo fruit.
• One sprout of mistletoe.
• Directions

1. Place the large ostrix leg into the vinca flower.
2. Pour the egg-nog basting the ostrix leg.
3. Cook this over a warm fire for one hour. Spinning the leg half way through.
4. Sprinkle the almonds on top of the ostrix leg cooking for an additional 30 minutes or until the almonds are crisp.
5. Slice the pongo frurit dropping them around the leg, flesh side down to absorb some of the flavors built up on the bottom of the flower.
6. Add the final touch by planting the mistletoe on the middle of the ostrix leg.

As winter approaches, us furres have our own way of keeping warm throughout the freezing winter months. Hearty cherry-muffins, sloppy-flower pies and scorching pepperoni pizza's are all delicious supplements throughout these cold months, rumor has it that throwing together three key ingredients found around Furcadia can make the best sort of snowman soup during these tiresome days, which make your taste sensations flourish and your body to become glowing in summery snuggles.
Naia carries the main ingredient, towards Vinca Falls where the falls are iced and snowflakes cover the icerink are crimson flowers. The pollen in these beautiful flowers carry seeds which burst into a tingling passion. These are the first ingredients towards your snowman soup.
Meovanni Village carries the tasty ingredients (depending on your taste knowledge). Some would say; sour.. others would say delicious. The Wisdom Tree shares not only it's knowledge but something deeper and tastier, the frozen daisy. The daisies petals are a key ingredient to the soup mixture you must be sincere to the tree to be handed it's most treasured items.
The final ingredient lies in the coldest and most heart breaching part of Furcadia. The Wylde: Mountains Aerie. Very few make it up to the top, some usually give up, others believe it's a myth. However the Aerie carries something precious and probably the most important ingredient in the mixture. Yellow mushrooms, found in the smallest most confined areas of the mountain.
The ingredients are to be seasoned in Eggnog before serving (find your nearest Eggnog cauldron in Naia). Once you have your Snowman soup prepared, prepare for the heart-warming holidays and enjoy your scrumptious soup! Happy Holidays!

HARDCORE HOLIDAYS: Ostherdibird with Pongo Sauce

Serves: Many, many people
Ingredients:

• 1 whole kiwi (the bird not the fruit)
• 1 whole herdbird
• 1 whole Ostrix
• 1/2 cup salt
• 1/4 cup pepper
• 1/4 cup garlic powder
• thyme
• oregano
• peppercorns
• paprika
• lightly roasted bell peppers
• stuffing
• olive oil

A delicious moderately-sized kiwi stuffed inside a plump herdbird (with bird-wool removed) which is then stuffed into a large ostrix. This is a different spin on the traditional cooked ostrix dinner. Now, you could do the preparation a day or two before, removing the wool from the herdbird, making the seasoning and removing all the bones from the birds (except for the legs of the ostrix)... if you're NORMAL like that. You want to prove that you're AWESOME and deserve to brag about how you're the best cook ever? YOU DO IT IN ONE DAY.

For your birds:

Kiwis are fast little buggers, but you can stop them in their tracks by SCARING THEIR GUTS OUT WITH YOUR RAW MANLINESS (especially if you are in fact, a woman). Herdbirds are easy, you go and dig a hole, awaiting one to come near. When it does, leisurely climb out and pick it up slowly so that you don't alert the poor farmer you just stole it from. As for ostrix, CRUSH the pine nuts in your bare hands as if they were a miniaturized town in your tyrannical hands. Lure the ostrix using the nut trail and karate-chop it from the back when it reaches your kitchen.

Or, if you're not TOUGH ENOUGH to hunt down your own birds, just place an order with one of the delivery airships to mail already-dead birds to you and avert your eyes from their judging stare.

Once you obtain your birds, prepare them by RIPPING OUT THEIR BONES and PLUCKING ALL THEIR FEATHERS so that they're fit to be cooked. Leave the legs of the ostrix intact to showcase your EXCELLENT HUNTING PROWESS, even if you didn't go hunt one yourself. You'll need to PUNCH THEIR GUTS OUT so that only the delicious meaty bits remain.

ANNIHILATE the herbs with a good mortar and pestle, combine with salt, pepper and garlic powder. Combine with stuffing. The stuffing, like the birds can be bought (with the same judgemental stare), or you can (and should) use your own recipe.

Dust the skin of the herdbird with the olive oil, then cover it in stuffing before placing it inside the ostrix. Repeat with the kiwi, but place it into the herdbird. Put remaining stuffing into the ostrix before stretching the ostrix up around the other two birds using your MIGHTY STRENGTH. Use your EXPERT SEWING SKILLS to stitch the bird together with HEAVY thread. Turn the Ostrix around to dust it in olive oil for that SHINY BROWN COAT. Bake the ostherdibird in a pan for at least five hours, at 350 degrees Fahrenheit until it reaches an internal temperature of 165 degrees Fahrenheit. Make sure that it's placed breast down for EXTRA MOISTNESS.

Remove the thread before serving. Prepare for INTENSE BIRDNESS and serve with a delicious mug of kiwi eggnog and the following pongo sauce:

Pongo Sauce:

Ingredients:

• 1 cup sugar
• 1 cup water
• 4 cups pongo fruits
• 1/4 cup cranberries

Boil the sugar and water in a saucepan over medium heat, stir with only half as much manliness as usual so that you don't spill some and burn yourself. When the sugar obediently dissolves, add the cranberries and pongo fruits and reduce the heat to a simmer. Turn off the heat when the fruits BURST OPEN AND PAINT THE PAN RED.

At this point, the mixture will simply have to GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN because it CAN'T TAKE THE HEAT. Reduce the heat, let it cool off at room temperature (it can't stand such a sudden temperature change, wussy fruits) before you pop it into the fridge.

With this sauce, you'll have a slightly tart and sour, sweet sauce that compliments the INTENSE BIRDNESS of the ostherdibird.

Ahh, the humble cookie: a Furcadian staple since 2003, and favourite of Christmas Cattens and festive Phoenixes alike. In the oncoming winter, what could be more comforting, while the windowpanes rattle with icy wind, and snowdrifts coat the land, than to fill your oven up with scrumptious, soothingly scented cookies? Crumbly and gooey, perfumed with delicious holiday spices, and accented by silky-smooth and refreshingly zesty jam, these cookies are flawless.

Onward!

FOR THE JAM
Preparation time: Overnight
Cooking time: One hour

• 1 kilo pongo fruit
• 4 cups Flox nectar
• 1/2 a Kasurian lemon, juiced and zested
• A knob of butter

Method:
1. The night before you want to make the jam, halve the pongo fruits, and bin any dodgy ones. They should be pretty and jewel-pink, not furry or decomposing.

2. Throw your halved pongo fruits into a bowl, and then pour half of the nectar on top. Mix them around nice and gently, and then cover and refrigerate overnight. Also place a saucer in the freezer.

3. The next morning, wash up five jam jars, and then put them in the oven at 275F for at least half an hour to sterilise.

4. Pour the contents of the refrigerated bowl into a big pan, then add the rest of the nectar, and the lemon juice. Stir this gloopy delight together over a gentle heat.

5. Bring the pan to the boil. Every ten minutes, check the setting point by letting a drop of jam fall onto the cold saucer. If it's sliding around all over the place like molten lead, it's not set yet. If, however, you poke it and it wrinkles, then your jam is ready.

6. Turn off the heat, and stir in your butter. If you have any weird scum floating on the surface, skim it off with a large spoon.

7. Let the jam cool for about ten minutes, while you remove the now sterilised jars from the oven.

8. Stir the jam, and then ladle it into your jars. Cover the top of each jar with a disc of wax paper, and then stick the lids back on.

9. Take a moment to marvel at your wondrous creation. Realise that you have never seen anything quite so shockingly pink. Tear up slightly at the sight of the beautiful little nuggets of pongo fruit bathing in a thick, delectable magenta nectar, shot through with delicate buttery swirls of lemon zest.

And then start making cookies, because really, what else are we here for?

FOR THE COOKIES
Preparation time: Ten minutes
Cooking time: Ten minutes

• 3/4 cup of butter, softened
• 1/2 cup Flox nectar
• 2 kiwi egg yolks
• 1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 teaspoons Aegyptian vanilla extract
• 1 teaspoon Theriopolian cinnamon
• 1 teaspoon ground ginger from the Katenga Coast
• 1/2 cup pongo jam, prepared earlier

Method:
1. In a bowl, cream together the butter, nectar, and kiwi egg yolks, and add the vanilla extract. Mix in the flour a bit at a time until a soft, pliable dough forms.

2. Throw in the cinnamon and ground ginger. Your kitchen now smells like the holiday season. Are you feeling festive yet? Drink eggnog if you feel so inclined. Hang up some mistletoe!

3. Roll the dough into balls that are about one inch in diameter.

4. Place your dough balls on a cookie sheet about two inches apart. Using your finger, poke a hole in the middle of each cookie, and then fill each hole with half a teaspoon of lush, gloopy pongo jam.

5. Bake for eight to ten minutes at 375F, until the cookies are golden brown, your kitchen is a cauldron of holiday spices, and you can't stand any more waiting.

6. Remove from the oven, and place on wire racks. Then -- and this is of the greatest importance -- take one of the cookies and stuff it in your mouth without regret. Realise that it was really hot, but decide to not care because it is perfection distilled into cookie form.

Enjoy!

Ever been looking for that perfect Holiday recipe within Furcadian walls? Want to have fun with your friends while spreading some joy? Well turn that holiday drear into holiday cheer with this fun loving recipe that's as easy as 1, 2, 3.

• Several Candycanes
• A Fire (located in Naia Green)
• Several Cuppa's
• Turkey Feast (No the lovebirds aren't turkeys you cannibals)
• Cookies (Lots of them. Who doesn't love cookies with fortunes in them)
• Snugs (Tons of them)
• Snowballs

Step 1:
Got those tongues at the ready? Really? No I'm serious, are you ready? Great because this first step is easy. It's time to get those delicious candy canes everyone loves seeing. They can be located in various parts of Furcadia though we're going to stick with Naia Green. Find yourself a giant Candy Cane and get licking (Only lick the bottom, you don't want to eat it all). Once you have enough, store them somewhere cold.

Step 2:
Got those heat-seeking goggles your mother bought for you last Christmas? ... And to think she said they wouldn't come in handy. Search high and low for the perfect fire, surrounded by many warm fluffs and/or pillows. Ideal for friends to keep their toes out of the snow. Once you've done that, bring the Candy Canes over and store them nearby.

Step 3:
Turkey. Turkey. Turkey. Did I mention, Turkey? Don't go chasing down any Lovebirds. Get into contact with your local Turkey Feasts providers (in this case, Digomarket) and order one delectable meal, lots of cookies and Cuppa's. Top off with enough snugs for your entire guest list and wait.

Step 4:
While waiting, it's time to get those invitations sent. What's a recipe if it doesn't contain good friends. Get those paws dirty and start writing some festive, holiday whispers. Make sure you leave the location and time, you don't want your friends roaming all over Furcadia looking for you; do you?

Step 5:
Snowballs, Snowballs, SNOWBALLS! For those annual snowball fights everyone loves so much. What's a recipe without those?

Step 6:
After everyone's arrived, the food's in and the snowballs are made. Begin sharing the cheer. Share a feast, pass out some cookies and entertain each other by seeing who can pelt the other with some snowballs. After all is done, and the snow starts to fall. Share some snugs and snuggle up close to the fire and re-tell the magic of Christmas for another year.

And there you have it. One recipe to help you get though the holidays. Not only is this recipe fun to read, you can make it happen. Try it out, and please remember. Spread a little bit of that Holiday cheer!!

Ps: No Lovebirds/Candy Canes were harmed in the making of this recipe.

4 egg yolks (reserve whites for meringue) 1 1/2 cup Naia Spring water 1 1/3 Kook Kufky's white sugar 1/4 teaspoon Wylde sea salt 3 tablespoons bovine butter 1/2 cup pongo juice 1 tablespoon finely grated pongo fruit

DIRECTIONS
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.
Whisk egg yolks in medium size mixing bowl.
In saucepan, combine Naia Spring water, Kook Kufky's sugar, and Wylde sea salt. Bring mixture to a boil, boil for 1 minute. Add to egg yolks and stir.
Heat mixture on low and gently stir in bovine butter, pongo juice, and pongo fruit until well combined. Pour mixture into pre-baked pie crust and top with meringue while still hot.
Bake for 10 to 12 minutes or until meringue is golden. Make sure pie is cooled completely, and enjoy!

With one whole catfish, a warm oven, bread crumbs, and a baking pan, and a few more tiny ingredients, you can win over your favorite feline friend in one small bite. First off, we must take this large fish and skin him in the easiest way possible(note: do not remove head or entrails). Take your chef's knife and run it from tail-fin to head carefully avoiding bones and removing all the meat. With this fish, season and pan sear it in a small pool of butter(preferably with two tablespoons). When fully cooked, and cooled, use your claws to shred the fish into hairlike pieces. With the fish in a large mixing bowl, add two eggs, 1/2 cup of milk, and 2 cups of bread crumbs. Take this mixture and add preferred seasonings to taste. Roll the mixture (approximately three tablespoons at a time) into round, or patty shaped forms. Place onto baking sheet and cook in the oven for a time period of about 25 minutes. Feed to your adored feline friend, and enjoy.

What exactly is this…kiwenguix? I am glad you asked, for it the most scrumptious layering of birds anyone could ever dream of. The delicacy at hand consists of the following main ingredients: kiwi, penguin, ostrix. Each slice indulges the taste buds with savory flavors seeping from the sweet stuffing. This dish is not the least bit difficult, but must be given time to prepare and cook – if you want to keep your guests from departure.

Prep Time: 1 hour
Cook Time: 4 hours
Serving Size: 12 to 14 servings

Ingredients:

• 1 (12 – 15 lbs) Ostrix, deboned
• 1 (8 – 10 lbs) Penguin, deboned
• 1 (4 – 5 lbs) Kiwi, deboned
• 2 ¾ cups prepared cookie bread stuffing
• 2 cups prepared muffin bread stuffing
• ½ cup whole palm fruit sauce
• 4 Tbsp. butter
• 1 Tbsp. olive oil
• ¼ cup chopped wild nuts
• 3 cloves garlic, chopped
• 6 fresh vinca flower leaves
• 2 Tbsp. fresh black rose leaves
• 1 Tbsp. browning sauce (mashed red, yellow, and purple roses)
• Salt & Pepper

Preparation:
Before anything, make sure that all three birds have been deboned before beginning the assembling of the greatest meal known to all. Remember to keep the birds cold (preferably covered in snow) until the point of cooking. We wouldn’t want an outbreak of the bird flu now, do we? Once the time has come for these birds to be placed within each other, don’t forget about the stuffing!

Put aside the measured 2¼ cups of cookie bread stuffing, whilst combining ½ cup of the stuffing with ½ cup of the muffin bread stuffing in another bowl. Gently merge the palm fruit sauce and chopped wild nuts in this bowl, placing the remaining cookie bread stuffing into another bowl. There should be three separate bowls filled with stuffing.

In a new bowl, combine and smash down the butter, garlic, vinca flower and black rose leaves. Make sure the herbs are finely diced and chopped up. Take this batter and spread evenly under each bird’s layer of skin – adding flavor to the meat. Be careful not to separate the skin from the meat, completely. Afterwards, rub the skin of the ostrich with the browning sauce (no flavor, just allows browning of the bird) and olive oil. Whilst sprinkling salt and pepper atop of the ostrix, don’t forget to flip the bird – over to sprinkle with salt and pepper, for la piece de resistance!

The time has come, en route for preheating the oven to 300 degrees Fahrenheit. Upon waiting for the oven to heat up, spread the cookie bread stuffing evenly over the ostrix cavity. Then, carefully place the penguin on top of the bread stuffing, skin-side down. Coat the top of the penguin’s open cavity with the palm fruit nut stuffing, toping it off with the kiwi, skin-side down.

Finally, take the remaining muffin bread stuffing and spread it across the top of your kiwi’s open cavity. Skewer the back of the duck closed, repeating the same process upon the ostrix. Carefully turn over the kiwenguix, making sure the seam-side is down and breast-side is up. Remove all of the skewers, minus the last one holding the ostrix together.

Take the kiwenguix and place it in a heavy roaster (big pan). Roast the kiwenguix for 4 hours, or until the meat is fully cooked. Remember to baste the kiwenguix with the pan juices, upon each hour.

Once it’s fully cooked, let the kiwenguix rest for 30 minutes before carving into it like a dragon. In order to serve, slice the kiwenguix across the breast, showing off each delectable layer of scrumptiousness.